By: Brianna Constant
Originally posted HERE
Did you forget the child I was?
Did you forget about the screams?
I wasn’t an easy child,
And these could’ve easily
Happened to me.
I may have lacked diagnosis then,
But I’m autistic nevertheless.
So here’s some scenarios
For you to imagine
Even under my guise of ADHD.
Remember when I fought the shots
Or even a simple blood check?
What if the frustrated nurse came
Back with an empty syringe,
And injected just a puff of air?
Would you feel relieved?
After all, it’d free you of the
hardship of raising me.
Would you instead be outraged?
Or am I just not that human?
Oh the public bathrooms,
And the squiggly squirmy worms,
Let’s not forget bugs in general,
And how they made life hell for you!
You couldn’t take me anywhere.
What if you came home to find
That someone had enough.
What if it was a drowning, poisoning,
Or say that I simply “fell” too hard
On those asbestos concrete floors?
Am I not human for mourning?
I remember the med check routine,
Did I fidget with hands and feet,
Or squirm in my seat in class?
Of course I did, I couldn’t help it.
But what if the doctor recommended
Treating me with bleach enemas?
What if that was the “cure” for me?
Would you be outraged at the thought
Of putting bleach into my body?
Would I not be human to resist?
Let’s revisit the bugs,
And the joy of springtime.
Remember those meltdowns in P.E.?
Yes, what if it happened one day
Where it led to a charge or arrest?
Would the school be in the right?
Would Virginia Beach police
Have done the right thing?
You knew what kind of child I was.
Was I human or a criminal?
Say I was in an institution,
Or I guess you could call it school,
Where they couldn’t resist a shock.
Sure, I bit/bite/hurt myself when I
Can’t manage my mood.
Sure I’d bruise here and there,
Self harm was self-medication.
But is this the treatment you signed for
The day that I was born?
Or perhaps I’m just not that human.